Summertime sadness

I was always afraid and I will be afraid of ordinary life.
Daily trips to supermarket, buying all kinds of unnecessary household things and watching stupid TV programs in the evening.
Is that awaits all of us in future?
Thoughts about this horrify me.
I become paralyzed and nothing can divert me.
Please, if I have ever become like them, kill me.
Sometimes I just want to buy a ticket to the other side of the world, such as Australia. 
And fly towards to sea breeze, waves and surfboard ( my dream, which I can't realize).
Generally, whose people, who live near the sea, are terribly lucky.
They can swim under the sailboard and enjoy endless 
of the sea.
Ah, dreams.
Sorry for such mood.
Probably the flat in my HB.
Or maybe the end of the summer.

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